Sakura's Mom
by Dead Idiot
Summary: Here's my first story. It a story of love, compassion, and pure insanity! NarutoX? This is a story for older kids, so consider yourself warned. Reviews and flames are accepted!


_**Sakura's Mom**_

**Disclaimer:** I own none of the characters or series from which they originate that may appear in this story. So don't sue me.

**A/N:** It's my first story, so go easy on me. Plus, I haven't had access to any Naruto anime for a while.

-

**Chapter One**

**Naruto's Got a Plan for Romance!**

_'Damn you Konohamaru. Damn you straight to hell.'_

These were the thoughts that were currently running through the mind of one Uzumaki Naruto as he traversed the streets of Konohagakure. Such thoughts were unusual for the blond-haired shinobi, for the boy was known to be an overly cheerful prankster with nothing but joy in his heart.

What is even more confounding,though, is the subject of Naruto's angry musings.

Konohamaru, grandson of the Sandaime Hokage, future genin of Konoha, and the number one follower of Uzumaki Naruto; should be the last person in the entirety of the Shinobi Countries that Naruto would even think of harboring dark thoughts of.

But on this bright, sunny day in the Fire Country, Naruto was all too willing to make exceptions.

Especially since Konohamaru was the main reason for why he running like his very life depended on it. Having lived his life as a prankster, running for hours on end was not very difficult for Naruto. Heck, he could outrun and outmaneuver virtually anything with his unusually large amount of stamina, including: various chunin and jounin, several angry mobs of Uchia Sasuke fan girls, a pack of nin-dogs, and even the Sandaime himself.

Thinking back on said Hokage, the blond genin couldn't help but let out a snicker. Letting his mind drift a little, he was able to remember the specifics of that event.

(**Flashback Alert!**)

_It was yet another beautiful morning in Konoha. The birds were chirping and the sun shined with a glorious radiance._

_Sighing happily, Sarutobi couldn't help but feel rejuvenated by the sun's warming rays. As he looked across the sprawling landscape of Konoha from his desk, the aged man could see various people arising from their beds to begin a new day. The occasional merchant bustled here and there, making preparations for the morning commerce. Smoke rose from various chimney's as wives made breakfasts for their families. _

_Though he seen this view many a time, the Hokage always found dawn in Konoha as something that should never be taken for granted. Taking a gentle pull of his pipe, he felt further relaxed by the effects of the nicotine in the already lax atmosphere._

_Turning towards his desk, Sarutobi was sharply withdrawn from his reverie by the mountains of unfinished paperwork that covered his wooden desk. _

"_I might as well get started." the Sandaime sighed heavily. Pulling out his wooden chair from the desk, he resigned himself to work._

_'Click'._

_Sarutobi barely had a millisecond to look up before a trap-door in the ceiling opened and allowed a viscous, red liquid to pour out and cover him from head to toe in its gooeyness. Another millisecond later and a hail of feathers joined the onslaught of the Sandaime Hokage._

_Sitting in his chair with the appearance of a giant chicken, the poor man could only stare at the ceiling dumbfounded, his eye twitching occasionally. _

"_Ahahahahaha!" The humiliated, and very uncomfortable, man snapped his attention to the doorway at the opposite side of the room where he was greeted by a familiar site. A young, blond-haired boy no older than six years old stood there laughing at the recently chickenified man. Clad in a black shirt bearing a red spiral on the front and orange shorts, the boy stood out clearly against the wooden door-frame. It was all too easy for the aged man to discover his identity and realized just what had happened to him._

_He had been pranked, yet again, by Uzumaki Naruto._

_The boy eventually stopped his outburst of laughter and settled for an ear-to-ear, fox-like grin that he was all to popular. The spiked hair and three whisker-like scars adorning each cheek served to make his appearance even more like that of some over-sized fox._

"_Ha ha, I gotcha again Hokage-jisan!" the hyper-active six year old yelled, the fox grin never leaving his face, his blue eyes sparkling with mirth. Then, his eyes scrunched together in a scrutinizing manner as he took notice of the scowl that had appeared on the Hokage's face. "Eh, what's wrong ojiji-san?"_

" _Naruto-kun, come here." the old man asked heatedly._

_Suddenly, warning bells went off in young Naruto's head, screeching at him that it was time to get the proverbial 'heck out of dodge'._

"_Uh..wish I could, but I've..erm..got..school, yeah! So I'll..ah..See yah!" and then the blond-haired, blue-eyed boy was suddenly gone, followed closely by the chicken-like Hokage._

_Down the hall, a jump down two-flights of stairs, and an incident with the secretary later and the two were outside of the Hokage's tower, leaping from roof to roof._

"_Get back here Naruto!" yelled an exasperated Hokage. The boy's only response was another one of his trademark grins and a very loud raspberry._

"_You gotta catch me, ojiji-san." Naruto yelled over his shoulder. Then, he promptly leaped into an alleyway, his laughter echoing as he fell._

_Not wanting lose the prankster, and wishing to inflict serious amounts of harm to the boy, Sarutobi followed suit and jumped into the dark divide._

_Only to find that the fox boy wasn't there._

_In his current state of confusion and frustration, he was barely able to hear a muffled snicker before he knocked to the ground by an avalanche of white powder._

_The disgruntled man looked upward into the blue-eyes of his smiling attacker. _'How did he manage to fool me.' _were the thoughts of the old man as he picked himself up, scratching his elbow as he did so. To fool a kage of his stature so easily and twice, no less, was not an ordinary feat. He then pondered his current situation, scratching his thigh thoughtfully._

_Wait, scratching? His thigh?_

_And his arms, legs, chest, and everywhere!_

_It hit him like a ton of bricks. He had just been covered in itching powder._

_Very, very itchy itching powder._

_Naruto let out another series of cackles as he watched the old man scratch his body fervently. Grinning madly, he turned and left the itchy Hokage to his fate, yelling loudly "See yah, ojiji-san!" _

"_NAARUUTOO!"_

(**End Flashback**)

"Moorooagh!"

The spiky-haired shinobi was brought from his reverie by an enraged moo. Looking over his shoulder, he could see very clearly the faces of his current pursuers.

Bulls.

Lots and lots of angry bulls all focused on crushing his orange-clad body into dust.

Judging the distance between him and the mob of murderous bovine, Naruto guessed that they had gained about five feet of ground during his mental distraction. Needless to say, he picked up the pace.

_'Damn.'_

This day had just gotten worse and worse for the blond shinobi. Not only was he late for the finals of the Chunin Exam, but now he was being chased all over Konoha by a herd of very ticked off bulls.

He tilted his head to the side slightly as he tried to remember just how the heck he'd gotten this mess.

_'Oh yeah, Konohamaru's the one who got me here.' _he thought as he began to recall the events that had led to his situation.

(**Flashback no. 2!**)

_Once again, it was a beautiful day in Konoha. The birds chirped, the sun shined, and an orange bullet with yellow hair sped down the streets like a bat out of hell, cursing colorfully._

_Hold it, orange bullet with yellow hair?_

"_Dammit, I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!" Uzumaki Naruto cried like a mantra as he ran. He was late once again, and for his Chunin Exam finals for Kami-sama's sake! Of course, it wasn't like he expected his alarm clock to suddenly have a malfunction, but couldn't it have been on some other, less important day!_

"_Oi, boss, over here!" a small voice suddenly shouted from seemingly nowhere. Screeching to a halt, the blond looked about before his sapphire eyes finally rested on the small frame of Konohamaru. Dressed in his traditional yellow shirt, blue shorts, scarf and goggles, the boy was quite sight._

"_Oh, Konohamaru." the older boy said, surprise fringing his statement. "Sorry, I can't play right now. I've gotta get to the finals." _

"_I know that! That's why I'm going to help you!" Konohamaru, a grin similar to a certain fox boy's spreading across his face._

"_Eh?" was the the surprised response of Naruto._

_Putting a hand to the side of his mouth, he whispered "I know a short-cut that will get you to the stadium in time."_

_At this, Naruto's whiskered face lit up like some over-decorated Christmas tree. "Eh, really, Konohamaru? You'd tell me how to get there?" he exclaimed._

"_Uh uh." replied the youth, shaking his unruly, brunette head. "NANI?-! Whatta mean you won't tell me?" Naruto cried comically. "I mean I won't tell, but I'll show the way!" was Konohomaru's excited reply._

_Naruto just gave the boy a blank stare before exploding into a full-blown nice-guy pose, with thumb stretched skyward and teeth pinging. "Yosh! Lead on, my subordinate!"_

"_Right boss!"_

(**End Flashback**)

"Yipe!"

The tip of a very sharp horn had scraped against Naruto's back around the red spiral, on which all the bulls seemed to be fixated. On impulse, the boy went even faster, cursing himself for being so unaware of his surroundings. _'Geez, that was close. Gotta concentrate on the situation at hand. Think about how to kill Konohamaru-teme later.'_

Suddenly, his shinobi senses alerted him of two large chakra signatures coming in from his left and right. Turning his head left and right, he saw to distinct masses of orange being followed by their own herds of angry bulls. _'What the hell?' _Earlier on, he had created a mass of Kage Bunshin to lead away a portion of the bulls in the hopes of losing them.

As the groups joined, he singled out one and asked in a frustrated tone "Just what the hell is going on! You guys were supposed to lead them _away_, not bring them back!"

Sheepishly, the clone replied "Gomen, but we couldn't lose them Naruto-taicho, so we thought it might be best to regroup and formulate a plan."

"Formulate a plan! Why the hell didn't you just dispel?-!"

His only reply was a blank stare from the thunder-struck clone.

_'Dammit! I don't this crap right now when I' m so close.'_ thought the pissed teen. However, these thoughts weren't centered around his tardiness. No, what he was truly afraid was that his plans that he'd worked so hard on making might actually fail.

During the month of training with the Sannin called Jiraiya, whom Naruto constantly referred to as 'Ero-Sennin', Naruto had learned that the white-haired pervert was also skilled in stage performances and, more importantly, very talented with a bass guitar.

With this knowledge, the boy had confided in the older man his desire for a certain..female that he had his eye on for a while and asked for the older man's assistance in wooing her.

True to his perverted ways, Jiraiya agreed ecstatically to help his 'pupil' to win the heart of this woman and make her his. He even surprised Naruto by saying that he could provide additional support from his supposed 'sources'.

The boys thoughts once again shifted to take on the form of the object of his affection. Her pink hair, soft pale skin, beautiful green eyes, combined with a perfect hour-glass frame made his mind cloud over with romantic thoughts of the woman.

A predatory smile reminiscent of a certain certain nine-tailed demon's spread across his face. Today, his plans would finally come to fruition, and he would hold the woman of his dreams within his passionate embrace.

_'Oh, yes. You **will **be mine soon, Haruno-san.'_

-

"Achoo!"

"Okaa-san, are you alright?" asked a pink-haired, green-eyed teen worriedly.

"It's alright, Sakura. Someone's probably talking about me." replied the older woman in a humorous tone to alleviate her daughter's troubled mind.

Haruno Sakura still worried, though. Her mother, a near exact copy of herself except for more her feminine form, had gone through various sneezing fits in the last month. The woman had passed off as just allergies, but Sakura couldn't help but feel a sense of dread.

Tearing her eyes from the older woman, she forced herself to look down at the center of the stadium. Standing side-by-side were the finalists for the Chunin Exam. Under further scrutiny, she noticed that three participants were missing. One was that Sound guy from earlier, and the other two were her beloved 'Sasuke-kun' and the knuckled-headed prankster, Naruto.

Then something caught her eye. Two other non-participants besides the examiner were standing in the sandy fighting-grounds.

One thought came to her mind. _'Why are Kakashi-sensei and Ebisu-sensei down there?'_

-

**A/N: **There's chapter one for ya' folks. Perhaps you can guess the pairing now, eh. Anyways, review and tell me how I did.


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